


Every 1st of August

by shiro_with_blueberries



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Kazunari is dead but this is a ghost au, M/M, No please dont leave, References to Depression, also tsuzuru has depression towards the end, and the ending is pretty much bittersweet, but i promise its cute, ghost au, ghost kazu, i promise it's good give it a tINY CHANCE, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:06:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28943424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shiro_with_blueberries/pseuds/shiro_with_blueberries
Summary: Day 6: Favourite AU (Ghost!Kazu AU)Kazunari has always been around Tsuzuru, and it can't be in any other way. He's the only one who's able to see him, after all. And after all the feelings they've developed after a lifetime together, that can't possibly change.
Relationships: Minagi Tsuzuru/Miyoshi Kazunari
Comments: 6
Kudos: 13
Collections: TsuzuKazu Week 2021





	Every 1st of August

Kazunari had been there as far as Tsuzuru’s memories could get. Just a kid like him, very willing to talk about anything, sticking around wherever he went. Tsuzuru had fun with him, but there was something off. He would be right there, but no one would talk to him, and they looked at him in a weird way whenever he did. He discussed it with his family many times because of that and had to explain everything to a nice woman he didn’t even know who also asked too many questions. He started getting mad at his friend, because everyone avoided him or called him weird whenever he was there. But Kazunari seemed so confused as well when he recognised Tsuzuru was the only one who answered when he spoke, and he guessed no one could see him anymore, not even his family. He couldn’t touch anything either. And it felt so lonely.

They later discovered Kazunari had died some time ago, and only Tsuzuru could see him.

They decided to stick together, because any other option would leave Kazunari completely alone. It was Tsuzuru’s friend after all, so he wouldn’t let that happen. If everyone else left him alone, then they would at least have each other. Even so, he sometimes had a hard time dealing with loneliness and other kids at school, and he would blame Kazu. Even if he always apologised and told him he didn’t mean any of that, Kazunari kept blaming himself for making that poor kid so isolated, stuck with someone he couldn’t even touch. But then Tsuzuru had these details with him that made him think he was truly wanted there.

On Kazu’s first birthday with him, he was told he would get a present. He couldn’t keep stuff, though, asides from the things Tsuzuru kept on “Miyoshi’s drawer”, as he called it, where they kept all the stuff that Kazunari liked. He couldn’t touch any of those anyways, so he couldn’t imagine getting a present for his birthday. The confusion only kept growing when they started walking until they were a bit far from home. It was getting dark, so Kazunari got worried.

“Don’t worry. I have everything under control.”

That’s the only answer he would get whenever he pointed out the time or the distance. When they started being surrounded by more and more trees, he truly started wondering the extent of the control Tsuzuru claimed to be on. Until he abruptly stopped.

“We’re here!”

Kazu followed the direction Tsuzuru’s eyes were pointing towards. There was a lake, only accompanied by endless trees. Just how far had they walked? Before Kazunari could ask that, Tsuzuru sat next to him.

“What are you doing?” That was his question instead.

“Sit and wait for the magic to happen.”

Still very lost in that situation, Kazunari mimicked him. They waited in silence, staring at the sky getting darker and darker, until a sparkle crossed Kazunari’s sight. When he tried to follow it, another one appeared, and another, and another. They were suddenly surrounded by endless fireflies flying around, so many it felt like a dream. Tsuzuru watched how his friend gasped, trying to look everywhere at the same time. He could see some of the fireflies go through him and heard his laugh due to it.

“Happy birthday, Miyoshi. Since you can’t touch things, I wanted to give you an experience. I hope you like it!”

That dumb smile couldn’t abandon their lips when their eyes met. A distinct aura was around Kazunari, a shining one. Tsuzuru thought he could totally be a firefly only if he was smaller. He didn’t know why exactly, but he knew that was a good thing.

“Thank you so much. I love it, really!”

So much did he love it, he would always ask Tsuzuru to go there on his birthday, no matter how many years went by. Tsuzuru was still alone, even if he went through many phases towards his friend. He would sometimes think he only needed him in his life, and others kept blaming him for his loneliness. Still, no matter what, they remained together, and they would go to that lake to see magic every first day of August.

Things changed a lot after a while, when Tsuzuru joined a theatre company. He made friends, and got to do stuff he liked there, so it changed him. Kazunari was happy for him, for being able to see that newfound smile. He was also scared, though. They weren’t so comfortable around each other anymore for some reason, because they sometimes got nervous, and he would start shining. They still talked, but it felt different. It made Kazunari scared of losing him. Why would Tsuzuru want to keep such weird friendship with a ghost when he was now surrounded by so many people? He wanted him to be happier, but he was still the only thing he had.

When Kazunari’s birthday came up, though, Tsuzuru just stood up in the afternoon and smiled at him.

“It’s high time we left, isn’t it?”

They were silent while waiting, as usual. Kazunari stared at the distance, which was suddenly invaded by the dancing lights. There was no reaction at all. Tsuzuru puckered up his lips, and laid down on his back, looking at how the fireflies acted as fake stars for the ones he couldn’t see. He was satisfied when Kazunari did the same. He turned to him, using his own arm as a pillow. Kazunari only peeked at him, still looking down and worried.

“What’s going on in your mind?”

That grimace turned into a fading smile.

“Nothing!”

Tsuzuru’s eyebrow rose as he asked himself if Kazunari thought he could fool him with that gesture after spending a whole life together. His green eyes turned back to the sky, but Tsuzuru kept looking at him, entranced by that beauty only he could see, only he could write about it to make it real to the rest of the world. He was shining brighter, as it sometimes happened.

“You look so pretty when you shine like this.”

The way Kazunari looked back at him, shining even more, confirmed that he said that out loud, and not in his mind, as he intended.

“What…?”

“Uhm! Just thinking out loud!”

“How does that make it any better?”

That last sentence, Tsuzuru had to guess he pronounced it in a pout, because he was already looking away, cheeks burning in sudden heat. They both were. Not much time went by until Tsuzuru peeked at him again. He had been wanting to try something so bad for so long. Maybe nothing would happen if he did. He raised his hand and turned his palm towards Kazu’s direction. He could sense how he was being stared at with curiosity, but he didn’t return it, just waited. He was understood after a while.

Kazunari rose his hand as well, still shining as bright as the fireflies. His palm faced Tsuzuru’s. They both were staring at the scene, with that dark blue background decorated with light sparkles. The gap between them got narrower, until there was none. Their hands were supposed to touch, but they didn’t. There was no distance, but they were still so far. Still, Tsuzuru started moving his fingers, imagining how it would feel to caress Kazu’s. Kazunari did the same after a while, resulting in their hands sometimes being in the same place. They both were longing for something noticeable to come out of that, and there was nothing physical, but their feelings were as real as any other thing in the world. However, they couldn’t help but wonder how it was possible to miss something they never had as soon as their eyes met again, closer than ever.

“Happy birthday, Miyoshi.”

The same ritual was celebrated for some other years. None of them thought that would ever change, even if they did. Them being together was the only thing that always remained. But apparently, that string that tied up someone who was alive and a lost soul couldn’t last forever. Kazunari was happy, he felt like every day was a present, even if he was dead. That ended up being out of place. The only thing he did wrong was not living enough, and now he could part with plenty of experiences thanks to his inseparable soul partner. Nothing lasts forever, not even his light, which one day wasn’t there anymore, as if it never was. Tsuzuru could swear he heard his last words in his dreams.

“It’s high time I left, isn’t it?”

It took many sleepless nights, endless tears and an empty space next to him impossible to fill. Time would repair what it broke, he thought, only not to drown in his own sorrow. His heart ached every time he spoke to himself when he was trying to speak to him. He would look at his stuff, all the things that were important enough to be kept, living in memories and sighs. Life started to become something heavy, a burning road with no end, surrounded by darkness and loneliness he hadn’t felt for a long time. Until he looked at the calendar one day. August started that same day.

His way towards the magic felt pointless without the person whose birthday took place that day. And he still made it, because he was getting used to doing pointless things. He sat and waited in silence. One sparkle showed up and, to his surprise, that was it. Only one firefly, flying around him, which presence felt somehow warm. When Tsuzuru put his hand in front of him, the firefly rested on his finger. His eyes widened as a flooding feeling took over his whole body, something electrifying, burning, and still pleasing. The firefly started flying again before he could react, and he was suddenly surrounded by tons of them. Their reflection shone on the water, and on his crystallised eyes.

That feeling didn’t leave him as he watched the view he got used to show Kazunari every year. He didn’t feel the loneliness that had made its way through his days. The memories of the one he loved the most made him smile for the first time since he was gone, and that was prove enough that he would never completely leave him as long as his heart kept beating. His feelings were still real, and alive. And he wouldn’t let Kazunari disappear, ever.

“Happy birthday, Miyoshi…”

**Author's Note:**

> RORY'S DRAWING FOR THIS IS SUPER CUTE GUYS CHECH IT OUT ON THE LINK BELOW (@/PurisuRisu on Twitter). Also I love my beta so much thanks for everything ;A; Almost done!! Thanks for sticking around!!
> 
> https://twitter.com/PurisuRisu/status/1353103460279984132?s=20


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